The Wild Song of Standing Free.


Living in the knowledge that there is only one day;

for having valued the finite, sanctified the infinite and, at last, essenced the extremely transcendental;

that is, having been immersed in Grace without being taken by the guises of Grace;

having been immersed by Grace and having been amused by the guises of Grace;


and having inspired the great and eerie implosion, and then the tremendous upheaval of the body;

having gasped at the opening of the Third Eye (prior to the push through the head and out the top) at that moment when any wish be granted;

having forgone the wish and the siddhis that would come;

having merely gazed at suchness;

then having braced for the opening of the crown, and having facilitated it by uttering the name of the One: Da! Da! Da! Da! Da!

Having completed the circle dramatically; having, after all, accepted the movement of the ball of energy as the great and humorous performance of divine power which occurs in humans, which can exploited by the Master, which purifies the recipient, which is given by Grace, which cries out the nature of one's condition (by its painful ascendance), but which improves one's condition by its sheer power to bend toward The Absolute the misshapen form;

Understanding that the experience is neither spiritual nor ultimate, but a demonstration of one of the tricks of Grace and the Guru whose purpose it is to move the seeker toward the condition of Standing Alone;

Understanding the secret of the Master: that knowing the devotee because He is the devotee, He can only await the devotee, that the devotee may surrender secrets and sevens unto the Master;

That even the gesture of recognition of the Master is a great step, even if it be taken in silence and accompanied by no apparent yielding;

that recognition of the Master does mean immersion into the Grace of the Master and that this lifetime is bound to be filled with understanding of consciousness;

that the Master has known plentiful lives and worlds, yet lives none and in none and is fascinated and longing for none; that He is Standing Alone;


and while attendant to the Third Eye;

while attendant to suchness;

while attendant to the surge of Divine Energy through and beyond the top of the head;

while attendant not to three but to the One and Complete Circle of Bliss: OM, I AM I AM AND I AM I AM, UMBA -

I am Standing Alone;


and having grown from understanding to understanding, not by a rejection or turning away from this or that quality of understanding, but by an attraction to the next level of understanding;

having seen that the attraction to higher understanding and residence there is Grace;

and having inquired: "Standing Alone?";

and having understood that the sound of Standing Alone is OM;

and that the personality of Standing Alone is the hydrogen atom;

that the shawl of Standing Alone is spirituality;

and that the contemplation of Standing Alone is meditation;

that the glorification of Standing Alone is God;

and that the subject of Standing Alone is consciousness;

that the vision of Standing Alone is light;

and that the form of Standing Alone is Umba;

that the pulse of Standing Alone is the universe;

and that the radiance of Standing Alone is the One Enlightened Being, the Guru, the Master;

that the method of Standing Alone is inquiry and all the guises of Grace;

and that protector of Standing Alone is the quest, the clouds of Grace;

that the understanding of Standing Alone is Grace at every turn, from Attention to Integration of all that is attended to; from Integration to Transcendence; from Transcendence to Enlightenment; and from Enlightenment to Enlightenment to Enlightenment (or endless spiritual growth);


and having no tradition to uphold, yet having studied all traditions;

and having been approached by One Guru who came as two men;

and being intimate with them as they are with me, yet not seeing them as separate from me or me separate from them;

and having enjoyed steering the universe through Umba;


and opening the atom of duality and remaining within the created Interval (I strike the atom of duality in a certain place, the atom falls apart; my presence within the Interval I call Standing Alone);

and having had my attention drawn irresistibly through the center of every noble teaching and Truth ( a drawing which does not cease, and which is the Grace of Umba, and which is not separate from anything and which is named Standing Alone);

and saying there is no list of steps and not a single step by which one splits the atom of duality or drives the attention through the center of Truth;


and presenting a Chainwheel which links every displeasure and pleasure including the quest for enlightenment, and which is the House of Sadness;

and having built the Chainwheel, and having departed it while remaining the architect of sadness;

and having felt the sadness continuously;

and able to point out each link within the Chainwheel;

and the perfect sadness (Eternal Loneliness) having formed and having been;

and every germ of suffering having been speared by attention, integrated into the Chainwheel, transcended via transcendence of the Chainwheel itself (as the clouds of Grace became the guises of Grace and I became Grace);

and having silenced the Chainwheel of habit, whose wheelwise motion measures the day and forestalls Grace;

and having silenced OM or I AM I AM AND I AM I AM, which is the one act that cannot be willed for it is essencing or the becoming of Grace;

and having links to spiritual and religious traditions and identifying them with the Chainwheel;

and saying that the Chainwheel is necessary in order to communicate about Standing Alone and about what turns and grows: the Chainwheel, the desire or need to understand and improve one's physical and mental condition and faculties and all this implies;


and that addiction is the chain and perfect sadness the wheel;

that even The One Standing Alone may know addiction and perfect sadness or eternal loneliness, but that His purification is complete and the addiction and perfect sadness are only killing Him;

that The One Standing Alone remains the architect of sadness;


and having been attuned to the most sublime teaching of the Chainwheel, which is the howling of the Chainwheel to be free of itself and which is sound (OM or I AM I AM AND I AM I AM);

and which is the sparking of the Chainwheel to cease itself, and which is light;

and which is the oiling of the Chainwheel to ease itself, and which is the pungent, sweet and earthy nectar;


and then, and even now, being free of the Chainwheel even while being the architect of it;

for having seen that there is nothing, no Chainwheel and no Standing Alone;

and having nothing up my sleeves, no sleeves, and nothing in my hands right now, and no hands;

and in every portion of this writing is the fullness of ultimate truth;


and having been liberated by having defeated the lock that keeps intact the Chainwheel of habit, whose wheelwise movement measures the day and forestalls Grace, generates birth, death and re-birth;

and having done so by having observed and understood the links of the Chainwheel;

and how one link is every link;

and how one birth is every birth;

and how one death is every death;

and how one re-birth is every re-birth;

and how knowledge of ultimate truth is but a link in the Chainwheel of addiction and sadness whose wheelwise movement measures the day and forestalls Grace;

for having understood the patterns of my dreams;

and having understood the patterns of my eating;

and having understood the patterns of my unconscious and conscious life;

and having seen that these patterns are links within the Chainwheel of sadness, darkness, loss, frustration and confusion;

and having seen that these patterns are links within the Chainwheel of sadness and addiction to sugar, meat, chocolate, caffeine, salt, carbonation, fat, nicotine, alcohol;

and having seen that these patterns are links within the Chainwheel of sadness, addiction and sex in its many forms, even Tantric sex, and sex in every one of the stages of each form;


and having broken, shattered and disintegrated the Chainwheel of sadness, addiction, dreams, food, sex;

and having seen that the wheelwise movement measures the day and forestalls Grace;

and now residing in the atmosphere that remains;

and calling that residence Standing Alone;

and having broken, shattered and disintegrated the Chainwheel by having first witnessed its presence and then by having understood its presence, and finally by having selectively removed one link at a time during which process I observed that the removal of one link facilitated and catalyzed the removal of other links, and I came also to see that the reinforcement or strengthening of any one link was the reinforcement and strengthening of other links;

and having seen that moderation is not desirable for it strengthens and reinforces links and creates links;

and having seen that spareness results from the breakdown of the Chainwheel of addiction and sadness, and that spareness, not moderation, is appropriate as a means of initiating the breakdown of the Chainwheel (but only after witnessing and understanding the Chainwheel);

and so having removed one link after another, one link catalyzing the removal of another link and another; and having seen that when one link is supported other links are supported;

and having understood that an addiction to foods implies that when one type of food is eaten, for example, chocolate, all types of addictive foods are eaten and every link within the Chainwheel is supported, reinforced and strengthened;

and having seen that when the food portion of the Chainwheel is supported, reinforced and strengthened, so is every other portion of the Chainwheel, so that the Chainwheel forms an entity of desire and sadness which draws new life after death, and the wheelwise motion continues to forestall Grace;

but having broken, shattered and disintegrated the Chainwheel through witnessing,

understanding and a natural spareness;

and Standing Alone;


and having reorganized a new Chainwheel, one that is as a portion of symphony that echoes fleetingly across a clear sky, I, Standing Alone, remain the architect of the Chainwheel of sadness and addiction whose wheelwise movement measures nothing and which is Grace;

acknowledge the True Form and Teachings of The Master, who is the raft, river and other shore;

bow to the Guru who visited three times and initiated with three mantric forms: the deep and secret voice, the clomping of shoes and the spontaneous arising within of I AM I AM AND I AM I AM;

and deliver unto The Guru and The Master -- who is not different that you or me -- this wafer of existence.

The Wild Song of Standing Free.
Copyright 1997 by Jerry Katz. All rights reserved.